Wedding Dances

Most weddings have the traditional first dance, the dance of the bride with her father, and the dance of the groom with his mother. Some families have their own traditions about which songs to dance to. And some like to use this dance to celebrate a special bond. At a recent wedding I was at, the bride and her father loved to dance and be silly together; their dance together was the Electric Slide.

At a Jewish wedding, the tradition is to dance the horah, a traditional circle dance where the bride and groom are lifted on chairs as guests dance around them. The tradition began in Europe when men and women weren’t permitted to dance together; lifting the bride and groom on chairs allowed them to see each other at their own wedding reception. And in some areas, no wedding would be complete without the money dance. Guests pay the groom to take a turn around the dance floor with the bride; the couple uses the money to start their new life together.

Flowers, Cake, and Cameras

At most weddings, the bride tosses her bouquet to all the single women present; tradition is that whoever catches the bouquet will be the next to get married. And a newer tradition, but just as popular, is for the groom to toss his new bride’s garter to all the single men. There are lots of traditions, too, with the wedding cake. Most couples save the top layer of their cake to eat on their first anniversary. Of course, too, there’s the traditional cutting of the cake and feeding each other that first bite (and the strange tradition of stuffing cake in your new spouse’s face).

In the South, it’s popular at weddings to have a separate groom’s cake, usually decorated to celebrate a hobby or interest of the groom. Disposable cameras on wedding tables have led to lots of new wedding traditions. I have friends who take pictures of their ties at every wedding they go to. And I heard of a couple who takes fruit from garnishes at every wedding they go to to make a smiley face plate; they take a picture of it for the bride and groom as well as one for their own album.

Of course, there’s my favorite wedding tradition. At my wedding, my husband’s fraternity brothers continued their new tradition of serenading the bride. It’s a moment I’ll never forget!

What is a Destination Wedding?

A destination wedding is when your wedding takes place out of town (often somewhere tropical or romantic), and your guests travel there with you. Popular destination wedding spots include Hawaii, the Caribbean, Disney World and beaches worldwide. Rather than just having a ceremony and reception, a destination wedding usually includes activities for the length of the guests’ stay; dinners, excursions, sightseeing, and other parties. Because destination weddings are often much smaller than a traditional wedding, many couples have a reception when they return from their honeymoon to celebrate with their wider circle of friends and families.

Why Choose a Destination Wedding?

For some, choosing a destination wedding is a simple as wanting to get married in a special place. For example, a couple who dreams of getting married on the beach, one who wants to get married at the camp where they met in high school, or one who wants to say their vows at a special vacation spot. For others, a destination wedding is a way to both reduce the stress and cost of planning a wedding. Planning is made easy - most resorts that have wedding facilities have a wedding coordinator on-site to meet all of the bride and groom’s needs. Because you are planning a wedding out of town, the planner takes care of all the details; you just tell them your preferences. Most brides who have had a destination wedding rave about the planning - they have one meeting with the planner (often over the phone) where they pick out everything. It is so much easier (and so much less stressful) than the countless hours that go into planning the traditional wedding. For many couples, the cost of a destination wedding is also significantly cheaper. Getting married at a resort in Hawaii instead of a hotel in your hometown costs almost the same. But because most couples only invite their closest family and friends (20-40 guests is the norm) destination weddings cut cost by cutting guests. And many all-inclusive resorts have packages that are actually significantly cheaper than those in major US cities.

Mother Nature

Perhaps the most important factor in planning a beach wedding is Mother Nature. There are many more factors that can’t be controlled when having your wedding on the beach instead of indoors, and these need to be taken into consideration. First is the weather. Look at weather trends for the beach, and if there are times of the year that are particularly dry or rainy. Avoiding hurricane season (for an east coast beach) is a must, as is having a backup location (or a tent) in case it does rain.

Second are the tides. Having your beach wedding as the tide is coming in may sound romantic, but can be problematic if the waves begin lapping at your guests’ toes! Talk to your wedding planner about locating your wedding along a portion of the beach that is not affected by the tides, or as the tide is going out so that you won’t accidentally get wet! Bugs can also be an issue; if the beach is prone to mosquitoes, plan appropriately. Finally, consider time of day. Some beaches are beautiful at sunset, but have glares or strange odors at other times.

Guests

While a beach wedding may be beautiful, it can be tricky for guests. Few beaches are wheelchair accessible; if you have guests in wheelchairs, checking accessibility is a must. You will also want to consider amenities at the beach. While few amenities are really needed, be sure that the beach does have bathrooms available, and that those bathrooms will be open during your wedding.

Type of bathroom might be an issue as well, as some beach bathrooms are simply outhouses (and no one wants to use an outhouse in a bridesmaid dress!). Finally, think about whether or not you are ok with uninvited guests. If you are getting married on a public beach, your wedding, then, will be open to the public. Some people don’t mind if sunbathers take in their vows; others may want to look at a private beach where their wedding will be, well, private.

Uniquely Beach

Having a beach wedding means that certain parts of your wedding can be uniquely beach. Many couples choose more casual attire for a beach wedding; a simple white wedding dress for the bride, a light colored suit for the groom. Sundresses and Hawaiian shirts are popular attire for wedding parties in beach weddings. The music for your beach wedding can also be unique; steel drums, local musicians, or a ukulele. Your reception can also feature beach food; seafood and fruit are popular choices.

Where Should I Have My Wedding Abroad?

Weddings abroad give you more options than the standard beach or destination wedding. Many couples choose their location based on a shared interest or love of a culture. For example, a couple who shares a love of animals and adventure may choose to get married on safari in Africa. Other couples use a wedding abroad to fulfill a fantasy; there is nothing more romantic than getting married in a castle in Europe! And for many couples, a wedding abroad is a chance to discover their roots and connect with their family’s heritage. Many choose to go back to the country where their parents or grandparents immigrated from and celebrate their wedding with local food and customs.

How Do I Plan My Wedding Abroad?

Hiring a wedding planner is a must! Few are wealthy enough to afford multiple trips to a foreign country to plan their wedding. This is where wedding planners are invaluable. Choose a wedding planner with extensive experience in planning weddings abroad for Americans. Don’t hesitate to ask for references, and look at pictures and videos of other weddings that she/he has planned.

Will My Wedding Abroad be Legal?

One difficulty in having your wedding abroad is the legality of the wedding. Laws differ from country to country, and can vary quite a bit. Some European countries require residency of one of either the bride or groom; others have no requirement, and foreigners can have a legal civil ceremony without much paperwork. If you are looking to have a religious ceremony, the rules differ according to the religion. For example, if you are getting married in a Catholic church, the Catholic laws that govern marriage here in the United States apply to Catholic churches worldwide. Any marriage that is legally performed and valid abroad is recognized as a legal marriage here in the United States.

Other Things to Remember

Many people who have their wedding abroad have a very small guest list (only close family and friends). But whether your guest list is small or large, you will want to give your guests plenty of notice. Many couples send out a save the date card up to a year in advance of their formal invitations. And don’t forget to make sure your passports are up-to-date, and that you have secured any necessary visas for travel. Finally, use your wedding location to your advantage when planning your honeymoon. For example, if you are getting married in Italy, travel to other European countries for your honeymoon can be quite inexpensive.

Cruise Ship Weddings: Planning Made Simple

Depending on the cruise line you choose, you can be as involved as you want to be with planning. Many cruise lines have full-time wedding planners who make planning your cruise ship wedding a breeze. Once you give them the vision you have of your wedding, they will take care of the rest. No searching for florists, caterers, or bands; they take care of it all. Your cruise ship wedding can take place on the ship itself or in one of the ports of call. And with the exception of your clergy member (a few cruise lines provide clergy, though with the growth in popularity of cruise ship weddings, more and more lines are providing clergy), you have nothing to bring except your dress and yourselves!

Is it Expensive?

Just as with any wedding, the cost of cruise ship weddings can vary greatly. Carnival cruise lines have packages that start at less than $800, significantly cheaper than the cost of a traditional wedding. Of course, there are more expensive options as well, but for many couples, a cruise ship wedding allows them to have a luxury wedding at a budget price.

What About Guests?

With a cruise ship wedding, you have a few choices for your guests. You can get married right before the cruise begins (either on the ship or in the port city) with your family and friends, then enjoy the cruise as your honeymoon. Many couples choose to get married in a port city while on their cruise, and have their guests meet them there. The newlyweds then can get back on the ship to enjoy the next few days on their own together. Still others take advantage of cruise lines that allow guests to board the cruise ship for the wedding and reception only (mid-cruise), then get back off before the ship leaves port. And finally, some couples choose to bring their family with them for the entire cruise. This is my favorite part of a cruise ship wedding, as it allows you to extend the celebration for the entire length of the cruise instead of one night.

Even the best destination weddings can run into problems. Some couples plan their destination weddings for places that have romantic significance to them. They feel that, since they have been there so many times before, that they know the area and planning a destination wedding should be simple. Other folks plan destination weddings for places that they have never been to but have always dreamed of traveling to and even getting married there someday. Both options, believe it or not, can be recipes for disaster.

The Do’s And Don’ts Of The Best Destination Weddings

Even though you may have visited some romantic place for years that is miles and miles from your home the fact is you do not live there. The best destination weddings take everything into account including details such as marriage licenses and wedding cake makers. You may have had your first kiss in Key West but you never had to have someone put flowers in a chapel for your wedding there. Whether you have been to the location or not it is a good idea to hire a local wedding planner for your destination wedding. A professional wedding planner will make sure all of the details are attended to and, whether you have been to your dream location before or not, you will have a much better chance at having the best destination wedding if you put it in the hands of a professional.

One more thing that many people do wrong when planning a destination wedding is assuming that their friends and family will be there when they take their vows. Even the best destination weddings can sometimes cause a family crisis that may have a tough time healing. If future family harmony is high on your list of things you want to have after your wedding then you may want to take the time to make sure that all of the important friends and family are on board with the idea. It may be your wedding but it is your family’s future so you may want to take that into account when planning your destination wedding.

It is important to remember that your wedding reception will have a broad representation of all kinds of people from your family. Young, old, short, and tall will all be there and while it is your day you should also keep in mind that first impressions last forever and you want your first impression as a couple, your wedding’s reception decorations, to give the true flavor of your spirit but also the feeling that all are welcome.

So Who Really Made These Decorations?

I have been to a lot of wedding receptions in my day and I would like to tell you about a very interesting use of wedding reception decorations. I knew a couple that was to be married in October of the year and they were very excited. One of the most exciting things to them was that her grandfather, a proud World War II veteran, was to give her away. She was very close to her grandfather and, since her father had passed away in a car accident some years earlier, her grandfather had been her father figure for most of her life. In September of that year her grandfather passed away. They were both devastated but they decided to keep the wedding on as planned. At the reception the wedding’s reception decorations were all from the World War II era and they were all about her grandfather. The groom had agreed, he actually insisted, that they dedicate the reception to the memory of her grandfather. It was probably the most emotional reception I had ever been to and the groom did the toast, which was unusual enough, but he did the toast to the large portrait of her grandfather that was hanging over the head table. That, to me, was one of the best uses of wedding reception decorations I had ever seen.

Wedding reception decorations should convey the personality, and the feelings, of the couple. It doesn’t always have to be as somber as the situation I told you about, but it should be something from the heart. Keep it tasteful but also make it personal. You only get one wedding reception in your life so you should make sure that everything about it is as much you as it can possibly be.

I hear that a lot from people about Key West and Key West weddings. Key West in Florida seems to be one of the most romantic places in the world. Couples from all over spend their vacations in Key West just getting lost in the beauty of a Key West sunset or the feeling of the beach sand between their toes. It all seems so perfect and there are a lot of companies that exist solely for the purpose of helping you plan and execute your Key West wedding. Full packages that range from the perfect Key West hotel wedding to a Key West wedding on the beach at sunset are available and thousands of couples all over the world book their weddings in Key West.

Walkin’ The Plank Matey

So if you do a google search on the phrase pirate wedding you come up with the Fanta Sea Weddings website. Please do not ask why I did a google search on pirate weddings, just know that I did and this was the result right on top. Fanta Sea is one of the many Key West wedding planning companies that is being very creative in the services they offer. Of course one of the biggest sales tools used by wedding planners in Key West is pictures. Most of the wedding planner sites for that part of the country have pages and pages of happy couples on a beach at sunset, on a beautiful yacht on the open seas, or in a beautiful hotel with a wonderful view of Key West through a huge picture window. A picture is worth a thousand words and these photos are telling stories!

When you have a backdrop like Key West it is very easy to get creative and offer some of the most attractive wedding packages in the world. From pirate weddings to weddings on the beach at sunset, a Key West wedding is something many couples dream about and many companies work hard every day to make those dreams a reality.

I remember the day when I considered my best friend the luckiest guy on the planet. It was his wedding day and it had nothing to do with his bride. To this day I still have the picture of he and I over my desk and every once in a while I just look up and smile at how lucky he can be. My best friend’s wedding was held in New England on a cliff overlooking the ocean.

It really was a beautiful spot but the problem was that parking was at a dead end road some 400 yards away from the cliff. So we parked, walked down a narrow path that was cut through some thick forest for about 150 yards, then we emerged from the forest to find ourselves standing in the rough of the 5th hole of a public golf course. From there we had to walk another 200 yards up the fairway, in our wedding tuxes and dresses while there were golfers playing, and then we wound up cutting across the fairway to another path. This path wound its way about 50 more yards, over sand and gravel, to the cliff. It was the strangest outdoor wedding I had ever been to, the golfers thought it was too, and my friend is lucky because it did not rain. Lucky guy.

Location, Location, Location

As odd as my friend’s outdoor wedding was, I have always felt that that was the point of an outdoor wedding. An outdoor wedding, to me, is the chance to exchange vows someplace special that you cannot bring to a church or chapel. My friend chose this spot because that is where he took his wife to ask her to marry him. It seemed like a very strange place to take someone to pop the question but that is what they wanted. If you are going to do an outdoor wedding then have it at a spot of significance. Make the trip worth it.

I have also been to the outdoor weddings in sprawling parks and huge back yards and they are equally as impressive as the cliff wedding was. Sometimes there is a significance to the couple in just being outdoors that causes them to make their plans. Whatever your reason is for your wedding plans keep in mind, as you do your planning, that sometimes it even rains on outdoor weddings and having your wedding down the 5th fairway of a golf course and making your best man wear a black tux in the heat of August is just plain cruel.

I am also entertained by the people that clamor for photos from celebrity weddings. What did she wear? What did he wear? Who was in the wedding party? What did they say as their vows? What did they serve at the reception? Here is my question, who cares? This country’s unquenchable lust for news and gossip on celebrities is allowing Hollywood and the media to debase everything sacred in our society and turn it all into a huge joke. But it isn’t all bad.

It’s The Quiet Ones You Have To Watch

I find that the celebrity weddings that are reported on as a quiet little ceremony with no media or fans are the marriages in Hollywood that survive the longest. When there are no photographers flying in on helicopters to get that one great shot for The Enquirer, or when the wedding reception is not covered by CNN, then I see the resulting marriage as having a chance at survival. It really is not always the fault of the celebrities, in reality the majority of the fault can lie with the media. But the people that really keep this circus going are the American public and their infatuation with celebrity worship.

Ok so maybe the celebrities really are trying to have a quiet celebrity wedding and maybe they really do try and keep everything as under wraps as possible. If that is the case then what is the reason for the paparazzi hiding in the trees trying to take pictures of the bride as she walks down the aisle? It is the millions of people in America that just cannot seem to get enough news on celebrities. The fixation with knowing every little detail in a celebrity’s life has to make some celebrities claustrophobic after a while. Just because a celebrity makes their money by entertaining the public does not mean that all celebrities are forced to be entertainment every waking moment of their lives.